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Today has been weird. I suppose the past weeks have been weird. I keep living in a roller coaster where I feel everything and nothing and everything and nothing.
Currently I don't feel particularly depressed. I got over that a couple of days ago. Instead my mood is gray. With a hint of blue. I feel and I don't. I can't get excited even if I want to. We will go and see a movie tomorrow. A movie I can remember being so very excited about at some point. Now I just feel.. indifferent. And I wouldn't like to. I would like to be excited. Thrilled. But I'm not. The same happened with our trip abroad this weekend. I had a good time, I did. But part of the trip I just felt like I wasn't there. I suppose it's the anxiety that keeps me disconnected from the reality. It just doesn't seem like my life. This doesn't seem like me. Something is so horribly off and yet I don't know why. I'm just not here.
I've also been dizzy for around four days now. It's like this slightly hazy feeling that I have in my head the whole time. I hope that would stop too. Trying to iron it down but so far it doesn't seem too effective. But maybe it will work eventually.